Wednesday, January 16, 2013

John Fox vows to be more conservative

Fox to rewrite playbook in the offseason to ensure Broncos always play not to lose

DENVER, COAfter the Denver Broncos fell 38-35 to the Baltimore Ravens in the divisional round of the NFL playoffs, head coach John Fox vowed to change up his playcalling. 

“I regret not being more conservative,” said Fox, notorious for his run calls on 3rd and long. “I know that there were mistakes in the game that I could have prevented with conservatism.”


Fox was criticized for his conservative calls by many in the sports world for running the ball late in the game when a first down throw from Manning would have clinched a victory and for running out the clock at the end of both halves with multiple timeouts remaining.


“They're right to criticize my conservatism,” said Fox. “I simply wasn't conservative enough. That's the only way I could have prevented losing.”

When asked if it was correct to assume that Fox was coaching “not to lose,” he offered this in response.


“Well, duh,” said Fox. “Isn't that the purpose of the game? You play to not lose the game!” 


Fox said the Broncos offensive playbook will be limited to runs and punts next season despite having a future Hall-of-Fame quarterback in Peyton Manning. 


“Crap! I totally forgot about fumbling,” said Fox as he was thinking out loud. “I guess I'll just kneel it down ... but what if we fumble the snap? How the hell do teams not lose games? I can't even kneel the ball every time without worrying about making a mistake. And what about punt blocks? Can we just forfeit the right to play offense? Is that an option? God, this is stressful.”


The Ravens were able to tie the game after the Broncos punted in the closing minutes on a 70-yard bomb to Jacoby Jones where he badly beat "safety" Rahim Moore.


“I knew that Rahim Moore couldn't play the deep ball,” said Ravens coach John Harbaugh. “I've been scouting him since little league, and he looked just like he did in right field on a deep fly ball. It was pretty hilarious if you ask me.”


At press time, Peyton Manning was unavailable for comment as he was busy filming another Papa Johns commercial.

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