Manti Te'hoax II: Judgment Day

SOUTH BEND, IN—Word is spreading quickly that the heartbreaking tale about the girlfriend of Heisman runner-up Manti Te'o was actually an elaborate hoax. Her death and even existence were all a part of the lie, but it turns out that's just the tip of the iceberg in this conspiracy.

According to multiple sources from Notre Dame's athletic department, Manti Te'o is a cybernetic organism , or “cyborg,” created by the Notre Dame Department of Engineering and Robotics and planted with false memories.

“It's true,” said Dr. Eldon Tyrell, head of the robotics department. “Technically, Te'o the 'human' doesn't exist either. I guess we may have gone a bit overboard with his backstory. I knew we shouldn't have hired those damn English majors to write those memories.”