NFL Pro Bowl cancelled, will be replaced by talent show

NEW YORK CITY—After yet another Pro Bowl that lacked defense, intrigue or an audience that afterwards said, “Man, I'm glad I spent three hours watching that,” NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell will finally pull the plug on the annual all-star game.

Falcons Matt Ryan to skip Pro Bowl to start rap career

ATLANTA—Alright stop, collaborate and listen. Atlanta Falcons quarterback Matt Ryan is about to drop some rhymes over a fresh beat. 

“I have decided to take full advantage of my nickname, Matty Ice,” said Ryan, “and become a rapper.”

Matty Ice will skip this year's Pro Bowl in order to record his first single “Matty Ice, Ice Baby: I'm Under Pressure."

“I was so glad when we finally got knocked out of the playoffs,” said Ryan. “I was planning on getting in the studio after the Seattle game, but my team actually won a playoff game. I mean who saw that coming?”

“Just when the NFL thought its all-star game couldn't become any more of a joke,” commented the only NFL fan who was excited to watch the Pro Bowl, “an NFC quarterback drops out to drop his first single. Perfect. There goes my Sunday.”